Sometimes the obstacles seem insurmountable, the heartache is paralyzing, the fear is searing, the anxiety makes my head spin. It is only when I find the quiet in the fear that I find my strength and my purpose. And I write. And write and write. I am finally home.
I posted this status update on FB a few weeks ago. The private responses surprised me:
“How, how do you find the quiet place?”
“I have many dark places in my head and I fear them.”
“I have severe bouts of anxiety about my writing. How do you deal with yours?”
How I wish I had the answers to ...
Sorry for the interruption, but The Artist Unleashed posts have moved to a new domain. Please click HERE to read the rest of this post and for the opportunity to comment.
I posted this status update on FB a few weeks ago. The private responses surprised me:
“How, how do you find the quiet place?”
“I have many dark places in my head and I fear them.”
“I have severe bouts of anxiety about my writing. How do you deal with yours?”
How I wish I had the answers to ...
Sorry for the interruption, but The Artist Unleashed posts have moved to a new domain. Please click HERE to read the rest of this post and for the opportunity to comment.
Anxiety about writing is sourced in expectations and needs or demands in regard to our work and how it is received. It does not matter how successful or famous you become, the questioning for most does not end. Gaining perspective about what is important in life, and as important as it is, writing will never be the most important thing in any human beings life because that is a source of satisfaction so influenced, if not controlled by others and by society. Unless of course one is able to write purely for one's self and to find satisfaction in that act alone.
ReplyDeleteAnxiety in general may be projected onto our work but is sourced in deeper issues. I would say general anxiety is a call to soul work, but we are all different.
Here is something I wrote some time ago on anxiety and its frequent companions, panic and depression.
http://nomadletters.blogspot.com/2013/07/finding-path-through-panic-and.html
Great points and I will definitely read your post too, Roslyn. However, I don't understand how something cannot be the most important thing in one's life because it is influenced by what others think?
DeleteWell it can be Luca but it is unwise to allow it to be so. Peace and fulfillment lie within and as I said, unless you can write purely for yourself, and even then it will not be the most important thing in life because the most important thing in life needs to be who and what we are and not dependent on our work, job, creativity, or other human beings. The most important thing in life is being the best that you can be. Harder for some of us than others. :)
DeleteIt is also worth bearing in mind that anxiety is not a requirement for being a writer and not particular to those who write. There is still a strong belief in the 'tortured artist' as archetype for writers but this has more to do with nature than it does with writing as profession, career or creative expression.
ReplyDeleteI agree that the idea of the 'tortured artist' is a stereotype, but stereotypes are there because they are generalizations based on fact. It is true, that many writers experience anxiety but in some ways that's a good thing as it shows you care about what you are doing. I worry about all of the things that I care about in life and believe that it's part of our motivational engine that drives humans to success.
ReplyDeleteWriting is by nature introspective and meditative. It's interesting that great meditators describe moments of worry, panic, and horror during their practice as they strip away everything their mind and the world has constructed and look at themselves honestly, as they truly are. In that way, I think it's a natural part of the process.
Thanks Monica though, for these practical tips. I particularly like the aversion therapy and am sure that these will help a lot of people still coming to terms with this aspect of their craft.
Yes and no. I think sometimes people like the idea of a stereotype because it seems exotic but my point was it is neither necessary or synonymous. Many great writers are neither tortured nor exotic, quite the opposite in fact.
DeleteI think most people experience anxiety and know plenty of engineers, architects, mechanics, gardeners etc., who agonise as much as I might.
Writing is more solitary that is certainly true but then so are many professions. Scientific research can be very solitary for much of the time. You and the petri dish and microscope most of the time. I had a friend once who studied fireflies and who worked from home and her life was more introspective than mine because while my writing was solitary my life was that of an observer of the outside world.
Gardening is solitary and more meditative than writing in my book.
But then gardening, scientific work and writing are all creative... actually, many jobs are....it is just a matter of definition.
There is nothing exotic about a stereotype per se. That a group of people are ordinary and un-exotic can be a stereotype. All stereotypes speak to general truth, otherwise they would not exist. Of course there are, often many, exceptions to every stereotype.
DeleteI agree with you about the gardening. I was taking a buddhist definition of meditation, which is the act of concentrating completely on one thing. In that case any activity can be meditative. In fact, in Japan, almost every traditional art form-- flower arranging, calligraphy, and poetry--developed as a form of Zen buddhist meditation.
Yes, and the Quakers take a similar approach to absolutely everything - all is 'prayer' whether cleaning a toilet or creating a work of art.
DeleteNice post.
ReplyDelete