Insecure Writer's Support Group (sorry I missed the last couple!)

Wow ... I think I've forgotten to post for this group in the last two months ... I'm so sorry!

I have a lot of insecurities, actually. I think any creative being does. It's possibly the most felt feeling among us. So why is it so hard to voice?

I'm going to be completely honest. I don't really feel like talking about my insecurities today, because I'm trying to block them out after learning my publisher, Lucky Press, is ceasing publication, and that my debut novel, after only SIX months, will be out of print.

But hey, life goes on, and (fingers crossed), I may just be lucky enough to find a solution very soon. My fingers are tightly crossed, believe me! Please do me a favour and cross yours too!

I think you can probably guess what my insecurities are after this news, so I won't go into them.

So let me leave you with this:

Initially, I was angry. Then I was depressed. Then I was understanding ...
But now I'm in limbo. I feel like my book is in a coma. And I can't wait for the day the doctors tell me it's woken up.

If you were in my position, how would you feel?

My exciting news! (and Insecure Writer's Support Group)

Any of you familiar with the Annual Steinbeck Festival? Well, this year it's in its 32nd year, and its also combined with an International Fringe Fest. This means that events are organised ALL OVER THE WORLD. This year the festival will run during May 3rd -6th.

This is last year's events map:

Because this year's festival will feature Zachary Mason’s brilliant The Lost Books of the Odyssey, they want to hold one of the events on ... you guessed it, ITHACA!

And guess who's going to host it?

ME!

I. Am. So. Excited!

This is what it's about:

What can a voice change? A mind. A heart. The world. For thousands of years, writers, artists and musicians have been giving voice to our stories, our hopes, our dreams. Join us to celebrate the power of one voice—through story, song and image—in the work of Steinbeck and others. What can a voice change? Everything.

I'm going to have a chat with the Festival Director this afternoon to throw some ideas around. I'm hoping to make this an event Ithaca will never forget. It's not going to be anything MAJOR, as Ithaca is a small island, and tourism isn't spectacular, but I'm going to do the best I can to make it something special, whether only 3 or 300 people attend. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity for the island and it deserves the best.

So ... it's the first Insecure Writer's Support Group for the year. And I have a question: Can I live up to my own expectations?

What was I running from? My own insecurity?

Before I get into the deets of today's blog tour participants, let me remind you that today is also Alex J. Cavanaugh's Insecure Writers Support Group day! And yes, I'm still participating!


So here is my insecurity for today:

I'm paranoid that no one is really that interested in my blog tour. I'm worried that people are just gonna drop by and comment without really reading, and that everyone is going to miss out on all these amazing people I'm trying to draw attention to, as well as promote my book, as well as the CONTEST I'm running!

Source

I was telling a very good friend of mine, the other day, how blogging has become so much work and it's making me tired, but how I still LOVE it so much, but miss having the time to give it more of my attention. I was saying how I REALLY wanted connect with more people on a personal level and more frequently. That I wanted to focus on making and maintaining friendships with the followers I already have, so I can at least retain some integrity and actually care a lot about what I'm reading and what I comment on. Because I hate it when I'm reading someone's blog and I'm in such a rush that I only read a bit of it, but comment anyway just to show my face. It's cheating. And we all do it. You can't deny that fact. I don't like doing that! Do you? It makes me feel like a bad friend.

I've promised myself I'll never do that again, and if it means reading less posts, then so be it. I think it's better to pay proper attention to 10 posts in one day, rather than insignificant attention to 100 posts a day. I enjoy caring about what people have to say and leaving meaningful comments. I used to always do that. Now it depends on all sorts of factors whether I care or not. Primarily time and energy. Jeez, it just doesn't feel right! What do you think?

So anyway, that's what I'm insecure about today. I'm worried people are burned out and just skimming my posts when I actually have a lot of important things to say. I'm also insecure that this isn't just an insecurity, but a fact.


How does it make you feel to think people are just skimming your posts and commenting to leave their mark?

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Don't forget to guess which page in String Bridge the line in the title falls on to enter my 10-day contest!


Contest details:

If you missed MONDAY'S POST, here're the basics:

• You read the line in the title and guess which page it appears in the book. (people who have read the book can not compete, sorry!)
• You write your guess in the comments.
• On Friday November 11th, the Amazon Chart Rush day, I'll announce the winner. The winner will be the person who first guesses a number CLOSEST to the page a line falls on (pg. 1-288). If you guess and comment on all TEN lines (from Nov 1st - 10th) you'll have ten chances at winning the prize.

________________________

So, *sigh* ... onto the business at hand: participating in my blog tour today are the following charming and brilliant individuals. Please visit these blogs and follow, and maybe even read a few of their previous posts. I'm hoping this blog tour will also bring more readers and writers together, other than just promote my book!

Cherie Reich ~ (Review) A beautiful and flattering review from a beautiful woman I'd like to flatter.

"Cherie Reich is a writer, freelance editor and library assistant. She enjoys writing horror, fantasy, and mysteries, but she doesn't let that stop her from trying other genres. Her short stories have appeared in magazines and anthologies, and her horror novelette Once Upon a December Nightmare was published in August 2010 by Wild Child Publishing."

Denise Covey (L'Aussie) ~ (Interview) Strewth, mate! Ya gotta check this doozy out, it's all in Aussie slang! Includin' me bleedin' answers! 

"I read, write and travel. If you'd like to know more, click the button."

Jolene Perry ~ (Review/Interview) This comes in fives. High fives? Five dollar bills? Nah, five quick questions and favorite lines.

"At the age of 34 I finally know what I want to be when I grow up. And I'm doing it. Life is Good."

Lenny Lee ~ (Blog Lovin') Lenny is the coolest 12-year old on the planet. For those who know Lenny, you would understand why he is my indoor sunshine. He's one boy I could never live without! Thank you, Lenny, for this beautiful surprise this morning! Love you hundred more time bigger than the sun!


"i love people, animals and mostly everything. i don’t like animals or people getting hurt and i try to help stop it if i can. i love raccoons. i like talking to god. i like buddha and what he says. i love mother earth and i like my heart being connected to her. i help heal the earth. i hate asparagus! ick! i love apple pie with ice cream and mangos and lemon tarts and mcdonalds happy meals. i like sports. i love swimming with dolphins. i love to swim in the sea the ocean a lake a river a pool or anywhere! i’m part fish! ha ha. i like yoyos and hot wheels and flying kites. i love to make people laugh and feel happy. i love giving and getting hugs. i love writing all kinds of stuff."

Nicole Ducleroir ~ (Review) This review is so wonderful and well-written that an excerpt ended up on the book's website.

"I'm a short story author, aspiring novelist, and world traveler who has penned fiction from homes on three different continents. I currently live with my husband and two children in the Atlanta area. When I find myself less inspired by my Southern locale, I have only to rifle through memories of adventures abroad until colorful characters or thrilling plots come forth. And on the rare occasion that none arise...I've been known to finagle a flight out."

Rachel Morgan ~ (Interview) Quick questions and quick answers and stuff I don't usually say in public!

"I grew up in Durban, South Africa, but I spent a lot of that time living in my imagination (I still do!). I have an Honours degree in Genetics and right now I'm teaching Maths to high school girls. But what I really love to do is WRITE! When I was at school I spent as much time writing stories for my two best friends (starring us, of course!) as I did studying. If I could make a living telling stories, that would be the height of awesome.This is me trying."

Not going to be around on the 11th? Purchase String Bridge now via Lucky Press, LLC.

Please TWEET & FACEBOOK this post using #StringBridge!


Don't forget about the Amazon Chart Rush on November 11!

Insecure Writer's Support Group: Writing is my oxygen. Music is my carbon dioxide.

This month for Alex Cavanaugh's Insecure Writer's Support Group post, I'm going to talk about insecurities stemmed from juggling two areas of interest: writing and music.

Writing:
I haven't done any since finishing revisions on my second novel, Bitter Like Orange Peel. Nor have I really felt like it for more than a fleeting moment where my fingers went a little jelly-like and summoned a squeak of their own, "Stop using us for work. We need to be creative!" But it wasn't long before I was working my butt off again, and ignoring their little pleas for pleasure. I can't NOT work. Things are really tough for us right now and I'm so scared of not being able to find the time to write again. I feel like I'm lacking oxygen. Writing is my oxygen. (And music is my carbon dioxide, but I'll get to that in a minute).

But I can't just SIT DOWN AND WRITE. I need a few days of peace to prepare my brain, and then I need weeks of dedicated time to write at least a few chapters that are worth reading. I'm not one of those people who can sit down and tap out the first draft of a novel in two months by allocating myself two hours of every day to do so. For me it takes time and brain space. A lot of it. Probably about a year's worth. So I'm panicking. I pretty much have about a year left until I plan to have my second book out, which means I need to have the third one ready by then. I'd better get cracking! I'm so afraid I'll never get it written and end up being one of those authors with a 20-year break between releases. I'm not a fan of that (despite my most favorite author being one of them--ha!) And you know why I'm afraid this is might be a huge possibility? Because of the music ...

Music:
I love writing and performing music. In my home. In the studio. On stage? I'm not so sure. It really freaks me out. I can't see myself going the whole hog with music. It's just not one of my ambitions, you know, to be a rock star? That's why I say music is my carbon dioxide, because breathing it in and breathing it out again seems to be enough for me. I get my fix and all is good.

But the release of my debut album which accompanies my debut novel, String Bridge, is hitting the media here in Athens next month. So far I've been told that it's being written up as "album of the week" in the most widely used Internet source of entertainment news here in Athens, and as "album of the month" in a print music magazine, this coming November. I've been advised to get a band together, in order to play some live shows. A band. Wow. Not only am I a very shy performer, and not only does the idea of doing live shows twist my stomach into knots, but what is going to happen if my music really begins to take off? How could I possibly say no to pursuing it? And will all my spare time, which I would normally use to write, be invested in band rehearsal and song-writing? What will happen to my novel writing? Can I juggle both and produce novels and music to the quality my perfectionist self desires?

Insecurity:
Can I really be a one-man band?