Friday 16 December 2011

Deja Vu Blogfest: What do we women wish for?

Today, DL Hammons has teamed up with three awesome blogging buddies, Katie Mills (Creepy Query Girl), Lydia Kang, and Nicole Ducleroir, to bring you … the Deja Vu Blogfest. Please click the Blogfest Badge to locate the list of participants.


Basically, the idea behind this is that we re-post a post which didn't get the attention it deserved, either because it was written at the beginning of your blogging journey and didn't have any followers yet, or perhaps it was posted during a holiday season (um ... hello?) and not many people were lurking by.


Anyway, here's a post from the very first month I started blogging (March, 2010), and it is in MUCH need of an edit. A BIG edit. Yikes!!! But, I have refrained from doing so. So please, have a read, and just try to focus on the content, rather than its execution, please. Ha! Oh dear ...


What do we women wish for?

Sometimes I wish I was brought up living on a little farm and all I knew how to do was milk the cows and collect eggs. I wish all I ever knew about the outside world was what I read in the out-of-date secondhand school books I had as a child because that’s all my parents were able to afford. If I lived on a little farm, I would grow up to be so loyal to my family that I would take over the farm when they died simply to keep it in the family.


I would then teach my kids how to milk the cows and collect eggs and when it would be time for me to die, I would die content and satisfied with my achievements, because I would have achieved what I had set out to achieve. My kids would then take over the farm to keep it in the family too and it would continue like this for generations. My great great grandchildren would look at photographs of me on the farm and say, ‘Wow, can you imagine being alive then?’ That’s what I do when I look at old photographs of my grandparents. I look at the captured moment of happiness and that’s what lives on forever.


Has it ever occurred to you that the less one has and knows, the happier they are? The more one knows about the world, the more one wants to explore, and the more torn one feels. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, in fact, it’s exactly like me, and it's called ambition, but I do wonder sometimes, would my emotions fluctuate so much, if I didn’t have all these ambitions that I can’t possibility do, all at the same time, and which make me feel like I’m not achieving my goals because there is too much that I want to achieve? If I had a simple life on a farm for instance, and never knew any better, would I be happier?


Do you think you would be more content if you wanted less?

47 comments:

  1. Don't be so hard on yourself, this is a great post. Me? Because I'm moving to Mexico and can't take much with me, I've been giving away most of my stuff...and the more I get rid of, the happier I feel. When my daughters ask what I want for Christmas, I can't honestly think of one more "thing" I need.

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  2. Lovely post, Jessica. I'm glad you got to share it.

    I don't think living on a farm takes away the longing, especially now when so much is available to view the outside world. But I do agree living simpler can me wanting less. We live in a time where so much is available. I read and learned a lot from a book a couple of summers ago, http://www.amazon.com/Paradox-Choice-Why-More-Less/dp/0060005696/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1324031941&sr=8-1
    I don't usually read books like this, but it helped me appreciate what I have, instead of pining for the next thing.

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  3. I don't think, deep down, that anybody really believes in the "more-content-with-less" philosophy! I think it depends on what you want and the reasons for wanting these things. For me, personal self-fulfillment is important!
    Nice to meet you *waves*
    ~MISH~
    http://writer-in-transit.co.za/deja-vu-blogfest/

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  4. Possibly. But I think farmers lead actually pretty stressful lives unless they do really well. The tractor breaks down. The crops fail. Their horse runs away. The chickens rebel. I mean, It could be hard. :)

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  5. Sometimes I think life would be easier with less knowledge. But then I think of the fact that if you aren't sad you can't have the opposite happiness.

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  6. It's a great question... I wonder that too sometimes. I believe the simpler we make our lives the happier we'll be. I don't want the farm, I want an island where I can live off the land and ocean and make everything I use. I'm not exaggerating either. My hubby and I really would prefer this life. At some point, it's human nature to seek more knowledge... and to feel under-stimulated, but I think nature has a way of reining that back in, if we allow it to.
    I think that KISS (keep it simple, stupid) for writing applies to life as well. But it's hard to do.

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  7. Nice retro post - thanks for sharing!

    I've had less and I don't like it. So..uh...yeah. no. hehe. I know what you mean in a way, though - I wouldn't mind living in a really simple cuboid with no fancy walls or anything, just a place to put all my stuff while I go out to work. I want something that is mine that I earned. I don't want heaps, I just want to be able to pay my bills and know that I'll always have a home and so on!

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  8. I don't think so; I get a lot of satisfaction learning about the outside world and it's different cultures & perspectives. When it gets stressful, though, I try to remember that "life is a tragedy to those that feel, and a comedy to those that think." Can't recall who said it, but it keeps me giggling.

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  9. This is a really nice post, and it's good to get to read it, since I missed it the first time round.

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  10. great pic Jess! I sometimes reread little house on the prairie and can't help thinking how hard they worked but how simple everything was and how it took so little to make them happy. I certainly wish we could live more like that too!

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  11. Farms are over rated. All those animals poop....

    :)

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  12. I've often thought about this, Jessica. When I was a child, I dreamed of living outside a stuffy subdivision. I felt locked inside the walls of my home most of the time, because my parents worked all day and I had to stay inside until they got home. I longed for open space to run and play. Now, I'm still living in a subdivision and it still feels confining to me at times.

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  13. I am absolutely loving reading these old post from some of my favorite bloggers and getting the opportunity to see what was running through their minds early on. Yours was a perfect selection and I can recall you voiceing similar sentiments later on as you struggled with keeping all of the balls in the air.

    Thank you for taking part in our blogfest and making today so special!! :)

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  14. Great post. Very thought provoking.

    I think there's an element of wanting something we don't have, believing that it will fill in all our gaps. The key isn't getting what we want. It's wanting what we have.

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  15. It's to early for those deep questions but I can tell you...

    Milking cow and collecting eggs ain't that much fun and even farmers have satellite TV's. :)

    Nice entry though!
    Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

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  16. A simple life sounds wonderful but the feeling that the rest of the world was leaving me behind would eat at me I think.

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  17. Less is definitely more. Learned that when I gave up the 'stuff' to move to an island. Although, it doesn't stop you from wantings of ambition. Maybe it even makes that stronger.

    Interesting post.

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  18. Above in the comments, Vicki said "all those animals poop" ... hahahahaha

    I might agree with that. :)

    Great post.

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  19. Excellent choice for today! There's little I really want, but there's a lot that occupies my time. Life used to be simpler.

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  20. Jessica, I LOVED this post. Very thought provoking....I've reached the point in my life where I truly believe "Less is More," but that's one of those beliefs, or pieces of knowledge, that takes aging to fully grasp. I also believe that being content is impossible for those who live in horrible conditions. Thank goodness I'm living a happy, contented life.

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  21. I can't see you on a farm for long. Even in the old days, you would've felt a pull for something more. Or you'd of played one mean violin. :-)

    Having the fewest wants, I am nearest to the gods. - Socrates

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  22. Oh this is something I think about too. I will see a construction worker building a house and then imagine him going home to relax because surely he just spent an entire day creating and producing. He's done, right? Then I will wonder--what does that contentment feel like?
    But then again maybe they're not so content--maybe they go home wondering why they can't write that novel they always wanted to write!!
    :)

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  23. Even in our complex and info-intensive world, we can simplify. Instead of wanting everything, we can pick a goal to pursue and make that our life's ambition. Perhaps getting published, or raising a family, or cultivating the family farm. Just because there is so much to know and so much to do, we don't have to know it all, or do it all.

    Thought-provoking post, Jessica. Thanks!

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  24. I think about this a lot. I think the internet has spawned a lot of unhappiness, because of knowing the bad that's out there, and the good stuff we can't have but other do.

    Finding contentment is much more difficult in the time we live it.

    Great post to recycle, Jess!

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  25. I haven't read the other comments but I think that even if you were on the farm, you'd be trying to raise the biggest, brightest chickens with the biggest eggs. Ambition follows you everywhere - even to small places, between kernels of wheat. but I do think that people who are mentally challenged often live a life more charmed than most. they see the beauty in things - the simple beauty. and they do not worry about things they can not control.

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  26. What a great post, and it actually is very much something I'm going through right now. I suddenly have had an interest in our food industry, much to my detriment. I'm reading a lot and learning a lot and looking at our environment totally differently. It's exasperating, though, trying to find a balance and stay as green as I can within our financial boundaries and the boundaries of living in a DC suburb. Sometimes, I do think it would be so much easier not WANTING things. But then...I'm so excited about getting my iPad for Christmas. It's a delimma, and it's hard to sacrifice when you have the ability to fulfil your wants.

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  27. To answer your question: Yes.

    I've often thought about living a simpler life. I look at some of my friends in Tennessee and they seem pretty content with the way things are for them. I wouldn't give up my current lifestyle for it, but if I'd never known what I know then I might have less to worry about. But then again, the grass is always greener.


    Lee
    Tossing It Out

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  28. To complete this comment, I'll have to be Frank.

    Frank: I'm quite simple-minded. The things I want are few; most days I can say I am content. So, yes.

    And thank you for digging up this post!

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  29. I’ve always wanted to live on a farm. Actually, I believe that I was born in the wrong generation because ‘technology’ has no appeal to me. I also think that wherever we are in life, we will always want ‘more’. I mean, we would be envious of the farm down the road because it would be ‘bigger’.

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  30. I think the important piece of knowledge so many of us miss is being able to tell the difference between a need and a want. When we realize we have everything we need, the wants are less important.

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  31. I do live on a farm. A small one, with ponies and chickens and bunnies and dogs and cats, and the occasional turtle, lizard and even a pet rat.

    Though life here sometimes feels slower, I can tell you, it is no less complicated. We all, city and country mice alike, wish life weren't... so... complicated.

    We moved to the country with our kids, looking for this simpler life you were wishing for. We found the PEACE we were searching for was more in ourselves, than in our surroundings.

    Lovely post. Lovely wish.

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  32. I think I'm pretty content with things...but I'd still really like a book pub contract! ;)

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  33. For a long time, I wanted to live on a farm too. As a child, I was so naïve I believed I wouldn't have to use money for anything as a farmer, since I'd be getting everything I needed from the farm and wouldn't even need to work! I still would love to someday have a small hobby farm, esp. after one of the field trips I went on with my campers this summer was to a local farm where the couple and their four young sons are raising ducks, chickens, goats, cows, bunnies, and sheep. All the campers had so much fun there, and I got to milk a goat.

    I guess that's why most of my writing when I was younger was set in the 19th century, when many people indeed were farmers, or at least had to grow their own food and by default led what we'd considered simpler, slower-paced lives.

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  34. Great choice of post to re-post, Jessica! Sometimes I feel like this, like having high expectations makes me less contest... but then there are those times when high expectations are exceeded, and that's such a lovely feeling :-)

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  35. great choice for a re-post. I didn't grow up on a farm, but my father had a small veggie patch and about 12 chickens, not only did the chickens scare the crap out of me, they stunk!

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  36. Such a nice reminder of what simple things can bring us.

    However I also remember telling me, the human emotions stay the same. We still love, hurt, laugh, cry like they did...Life may have been easier but we were not there to tell what their worries were :-))

    Thanks a lot for sharing!

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  37. Sometimes a simpler lifestyle is much easier, and they say ignorance is bliss. I think finding a good balance is the key! Great blogfest, isn't it?

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  38. I thought this post was going to be about me based on the title.

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  39. Oh, excellent post. I think this resonates with a lot of people. I do think we would be content if we didn't want, but how many people would really give up there dreams? I know I'm not willing to and if that means roiling emotions, then I'll take them gladly. I may not get to accomplish all I want to, but for the things I don't get, I'll take the dreams over nothing any day.

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  40. A great re-post. enjoyed reading .
    Very well penned.

    Yvonne.

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  41. Hi Jessica. What a great post. Honest, transparent, full off the tension which reflects our human condition. Perhaps one of the great challenges in life is to find the balance between ambition and serenity. The other option is to give 'You can't have your cake and eat it too' the flick and do some serious research into the source of the Magic Pudding. May you find many pots of gold at the end of your rainbows - just remember to enjoy the vibrancy of the colours which will be all around you on the journey. Best wishes. Jeff.

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  42. I relate to this with my writing. I sometimes wish I had never discovered my love of writing. If I'd never written a novel, I would not feel so compelled to find an agent and be published. It's an obsession really. perhaps I'd be happier and more content if I had never taken this road. Oops, too late now!

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  43. LOVELY, emotive post for me b/c my early years were spent on a dairy farm. And, we spent two weeks each summer visiting our grandparents (both dairy farmers). I have copies of those old pictures, but--sadly--the family farm tradition died with my generation.

    I agree that one can be happy with "less" in the material sense. But, give me shiny-mind-baubles and adventures and books.

    As a newbie on blogging (less than 6 months), it's encouraging to read then-versus-now posts.

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  44. It is a fine line between being happy with what you have and ambition for more. I think we can have both and still keep it simple but it is hard to find that balance!

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  45. I like that it's the simple things that make me happy and content. I can relate with you there. However, I will always have a yearning to know more about the world in some way and would hate to have any regrets in the end about not pursuing something outside of my comfort zone.

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  46. Sorry to be so late coming here, I'm trying to catch up with all the blogs I missed in this event and am loving visiting them all!

    What a great post. I too wish I'd been born into a farming family - but probably not for the same reasons as you. I'm a country person through and through and have loved horses since I could walk. I saved up for five years for my first horse and before that I worked at the local stables for rides. If my family has a farm I could look out of the window and see my two horses grazing, instead of having to travel for forty minutes or so every day to get to them. But I do agree, the simple life can be much happier than accumulating money and material possessions. One thing I wouldn't want to be without though - and that's my computer!

    www.hywelalyn.blogsspot.com

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  47. ahh, fantastic post. I've thought this many times myself. The simple life. But at the same time, maybe I've seen this here before... It seems like I recall us having this conversation.

    But you know how it goes. Those grandkids sell the farm to developers and then end up frittering it away... So see? You're right where you're supposed to be~

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