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| Me, 2008, supporting Holly Golightly at Rodeo Club in Athens, Greece. |
-Jessica, that's disgusting.
-Yes, yes it is. I'm so ashamed.
Yeah, look, don't tell me it's natural, that there are only so many things that we can fit into this short time-slot of a day, because there's no excuse for forgetting that something enjoyable and relaxing and vital to my well-being exists. No excuse. At all.
-You have seemed a little absent lately. Maybe you're having withdrawals ...
-*sigh*
In all fairness, it doesn't help that all my CDs are stored away in a massive case, coverless, hiding in a drawer, still from ten years ago when I moved from Australia to Greece. Maybe it's time to buy a big CD rack, stick them into jewel cases at least, and label them with stickers or something, to remind myself that they are there.
-You're an idiot. Just open up the flippin' case once in a while!
-(silent stare)
Oh, and you know what's funny? My partner has THOUSANDS of albums. And I see them in front of me every day on the bookshelves. But it doesn't register that there is music in them. All I see now is a blur of colour embedded in our walls as if they are somehow a part of the walls themselves.
-Are you kidding? I saw something catch your eye there the other day.
-Yeah. Dust.
It also doesn't help that every time I do listen to music I end up in tears. Even if it's heavy metal. Must trigger some weird hidden psychological hurt, regret, melancholy, who knows ... *sigh*
I need to fix this. I need to make some sort of pact with my partner: one album every two days (?) until we've listened to every single one in our house ...
You think it'll happen? I guess if you see my crying, you'll know ...
What have you forgotten about since becoming a writer?
'Not only have I forgotten that I can actually write it (I haven't picked up my guitar since writing the String Bridge soundtrack), but I've forgotten it even exists.'
ReplyDeleteI took a deep sigh when I read this. I had this very same conversation with my osteopath the other day. I hadn't seen him in 18 months and during that time he hadn't picked up his guitar once, until five days prior to my appointment. He said he woke up on the first of those days and thought what am I waiting for? So, he picked up his guitar and played it for three hours. Just like that.
I think it is all too easy to make excuses, and the no longer we don't do something the worse it becomes. I know life gets in the way - I didn't write anything for the first six months of this year - but we have to make time for the things that really matter to us. You are a musician. You have a beautiful voice, and a talent for song writing. So, fix it. Put aside half an hour TODAY and play your guitar. Listen to an album. You CAN do it.
I haven't forgotten anything as big as that. Music sounds like it holds a pretty special in your life and your talents. Glad you decides to rediscover it!
ReplyDeleteI like that idea, about two albums a day. Gosh, it'd take forever to listen to all the music that we have... Right now I keep listening to Amanda Palmer's new album, but I'm lucky: I can listen to music at the day job and I love writing while listening to music (guess it helps that I'm not a musician myself).
ReplyDeleteI've mostly let the housework go. And every once in a while I wish I was knitting and crocheting more often.
My photography has drifted to the sidelines. So have a lot of fun, little projects I used to do.
ReplyDeleteMay you rediscover your music again.
Jessica, pick up your guitar and some CDs! You have so much talent. Don't let that slide.
ReplyDeleteAnd music would be the last thing on earth I'd give up. Well, make that second to the last...
I tend to be very crafty. Knitting, crocheting, making stuff for the house and kids. That's all gone the wayside. I channel all my creativity into writing. So yeah, I sorta miss that stuff. It's less important than music is to you, though, I'm sure.
ReplyDeleteLove this post--and I LOVE the idea of listening to 1-2 albums every day until you've listened to them all. My music has become so fragmented b/c of iTunes.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I've almost given up television since I started writing. I know, that might not be such a bad thing... :D <3 ((hugs))
My biggest problem is that all my music is on vinyl. Breaking it out to play is difficult. Well, there's that, and the problem that I used to stay up all night to listen to it. No time for that any more ...
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like an achievable pact! Go for it. You'll feel better when you start listening to your favorite music again!!
ReplyDeleteI understand the missing part of your creative spirit; my drums are often neglected, and the guitar and bass I bought to learn are still languishing on the first pages of the lesson books.
ReplyDeleteBest way is to make sure you listen to music and feed your creative soul that way first.
I also think everyone should have their creativity spread out into different creative areas. It refills the well and provides different perspectives.
All the best at getting your musical mojo back.
Adam B @revhappiness
I'll never give up on my music! I rarely use the cd's anymore, though, since iTunes does everything I could want. What I've fallen out of most since coming to writing is chess. I am good at chess and enjoy being good at it, so it is a little distressing to play it less and less over these past years.
ReplyDeleteMy art. I don't paint or draw as much when I'm writing. My desire to create it never goes away, the tools just sits there waiting. When in Paris, I sketched a bit, but mostly photographed and took notes for writing posts on Paris when I returned. I'm not concerned, it just makes me sad. (btw -love the self-talk)
ReplyDeleteWhile in the process of building my new home here in Akumal, Mexico and pursuing a retreat...my WRITING has taken a backseat. Thank heavens it's
ReplyDeletea backseat driver and keeps nagging at me.