Wednesday 7 April 2010

Part F: Facing Frustration

Following on from yesterday's post, today I'll focus on facing the frustration that ferments within us after receiving those foul rejection letters.

Firstly, and foremost, I do not feel like a failure. Rejections do not foreshadow failure, fellow writers. Have faith in that first, before you try to figure out anything else. Agents' findings are fickle. Why else would one agent fancy a full manuscript and another feed you this line: 'sorry this isn't right for us'? It's just the fashion of the business.

Fundamentally, if agents had fixed rules for finding clients, it would be most favourable. But they don't, and we must have faith that there is one agent out there with our field of vision.

But, that doesn't mean that I feel fully fearless after getting a full request, because following on from that full request, other rejection letters frightfully fall from the sky. Then I think, maybe the agent that requested my full will flout it. I fret for days. I file my nails, filling in time with futile tasks, waiting for a response. No, I still haven't got one. "F@*k you, computer!" It could feasibly be months. So, I fret until I fold from my own foolish fuss. But deep down I still fondle the frail hope that they'll fancy it - faith in this agent will forevermore float fervently in front of me like a fire fly, until it fades into fairlyland as a fuzzy flashback.

So before I file my nails to the bone, I fascinate myself with my following feat. I fill my mind with a fresh story. There's no other way to do it, I'm afraid. I know it's simpler said than done, but come on - we're writers - it's our finest flair - feel your keypad and type with finesse - it's therapeutic and a fabulous fix for frustration, believe me. It's emotionally fulfilling and distracts from fear.

That's how I face frustration, folks. I face facts and get back to work. How do you face frustration?


  1. Yeah its at times frustrating to face those frustrations ...Though I am jus a bloger , I can guess how frustraing it is for you , when you put on so much efort on writing a story only to get it rejected ...Its sad ..and its difficult to accept the fact and write a fresh one ...Really frustrating !!

    Thanx for drooping my place :)

  2. I vent my frustration on writing a poem about it. Angry words are not the answer. I love reading your post and am grateful for this challenge to have foind you.


  3. Facing frustrations can be frustrating, can't it?
    Great post.

    ~ Rayna

  4. HOW do you do that? LOL Talent. And a vast knowledge of words.

  5. Ah yes, I face frustration the same way, I send it out, then move on to the next project.

    Far more frustrating are the lack of rejection letters, when you're simply ignored!

  6. Waiting after sending out a full is sooooo hard! And receiving rejection from a full is even harder to receive than a rejection from a query. But, we must move on. Write. Read. Or add plugins to our blog.

    I believe you can subscribe to comments now! :)

  7. I face my frustration by feeding it french fries (no, I wasn't trying my hand at any alliterations there, it just happened) and cookies. My first rejection earned me two new pounds!

  8. Ver nice indeed! I don't know why I wasn't following you but I am now...I am asked by my family about why I don't write a book...maybe it is the fear of failure...I don't really know. By the way you once asked me if I wanted you to follow me on both of my daughter writes on one she is 9 so it is under my name..I write the Faith, Hope and Love blog so yes if you could follow me on that one it would be great! You are following My daughter on Molly's world already! Thanks and God bless...I loved this post, you always do such awesome alliteration!

  9. Great post -- made me smile. Not being a writer, I don't face those same frustrations. Other frustrations? Fist through the wall. I kid. I'm down to nubs because of filing past the first bone!:)

    Have a great day!

  10. I HATE waiting. It feels good to send out those queries for about fifteen minutes, eh? Then the fear begins that the rejections will start, because my personal best is a rejection in 20 minutes... totally serious. One agent found me so foul that it took her only 20 minutes to find me not up to snuff. *snort*

    Seriously though... dealing with frustration? I drink a lot... cruise websites filled with male strippers. If I had any money I might gamble...

    *cough* Maybe I'm not the best person to ask...

  11. Watery Tart: Good girl! Get into the booze! LOL Hey watcha doin' later? Wanna come over to piss fart around? Spit ball the computer screen at those rejections? :-O My turn to *snort* (I truly hope you are refering to the snort of laughter ... hmmm)

  12. I love your blog! Looking forward to following :)

    I'm working through the first draft of my MS, but hearing encouraging words from more experienced writers like yourself eases my mind about the query process to come. Thanks!

  13. Hi Nicole! Thanks for stopping by :) It's great to have you. I'm glad I could be of some encouragement! I sure need it myself sometimes. :)

  14. Feelings of frustration at times certainly try to overwhelm me at times. However, I'm not a writer so I don't face the same types of frustrations. Another great post :)

  15. I clean when I get frustrated. I clean when I have writer's block. You'd think my house would be spotless by now, but no. :D Fabulous F post!

  16. Nice post!! Love all the alliteration... you're really taking the A to Z challenge to the hilt!

    I'm with you on how to deal with frustration and rejection... we all have to go through it. But it's definitely worth the slogging, to get to the prize! Keep it up! :)

  17. Wanda: What do you mean you're not a writer? You write great blog posts. Hence, you are a writer :)

  18. And the F Award goes to....drum roll...Alliterative Allomorph for using the most F words in a post...ever!! That was awesome and I'm fanatically impressed!!:)

  19. Frustration = chocolate ;)

    I work in the garden if I am frustrated. Dead heading has a whole new meaning for me then!

  20. Rejection can be tough especially when you are giving your all... all you can do is get back up and keep going and keep trying again... whether it's writing or being a "rock star" whatever you choose you will have to deal with critics and skeptics... it's all about taking the good and leaving the bad. Keep it up! You're doing great!


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